Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Chapter 12

Skully One-Eye found a merchant ship that was headed to Greece and offered them 1000 pounds in gold to bring Medusa back to Greece. They agreed and Skully One-Eye gave them Jelly in case her venom was to return.

Vasca de Gama bid ado to Medusa who was more sorrow now. She belonged in Greece. She would go back to Greece and created havoc for other people who have crossed her.



That night as the crew went to bed a song could be heard off in the distance sung by a familiar voice. It must have just been the sea, they all thought as they fell asleep.

Chapter 11

After sailing down the river back to the ocean Skully One-Eye, Hackin Eve, and Vasca dove into the ocean to find the sea-jelly. After searching, surfacing and diving for nearly an hour Skully One-Eye finally found a patch of jelly secreting from a plant. Skully One-Eye brought a handful of the jelly onto the beach and then they rubbed it all over themselves. The extra jelly was put into a bottle to be used on their crewmates. After applying thee jelly they swam to where the JP was. They climbed on the side of the ship and slipped into a window of one of the cabins.

Medusa was on deck; she plied all the JP’s crew into a pile to make a human pyramid with Maximo at the top spot. Why had she attacked the ship and its crew? Vasca de Gama knew the answer. Vasca had many years before been a mate on a ship that was in the Mediterranean. Vasca got involved with Medusa while in Europe and ended up breaking her heart and leaving her for Liza Dregg who had just given birth to twins. Medusa got into a fight with Liza Dregg and nearly killed her. Medusa stole her babies and sold them to two different couples in different ports. Vasca never saw Medusa, Liza Dregg or the twin baby girls after that time. He always assumed that medusa killed Liza and the babies.

Medusa was seeking revenge on Vasca and whoever was on the same ship with him was in her warpath. Vasca told Skully One-Eye all about his long history with Medusa. Skully One-Eye was thinking that Vasca de Gama seems to have had a history with everyone they meet.

Medusa was screaming Vasca’s name while she was on the deck. Vasca popped up behind her. She was furious, as she turned around. “So we finally meet again, Vasca.” “What happened between us happened was nearly 20 years ago” said Vasca. “You broke my heart and ruined my life, all for that LIZA DREGG”. I never left you for her, she needed me to help her with her babies, her husband an old mate of mine was killed in battle. You jealousy drew a bad picture as to what was going on between Liza and I. You went crazy and destroyed many lives. You nuts, Medusa! You really are!” This sent Medusa into a tailspin. She struck Vasca with one of her snakes, but it had no effect. She was puzzled. A sword came flying down and chopped off one of her snakes from her head. It was Hackin Eve who chopped off the snake, she snuck up behind her. Medusa screamed out in pain. And attacked Hackin Eve but the bite had no effect. “Face it Medusa you can’t stop us” Said Skully One-Eye. Medusa was quickly detained and put into the dungeon. Skully One-Eye, Vasca and Hackin Eve rubbed the jelly onto the spots where the other members were struck. A few minutes later everyone began to wake up.

Now they had to figure out what to do with Medusa.

Skully One-Eye along with Vasca and Lurg went to visit with the Elders again that night. The Elders told them that Medusa must not be destroyed, but they will be cursed for eternity, but she must be returned to Greece. The babies that Vasca and Medusa talked of in fact were still alive. And Sid had a favor for Skully One-Eye, for all of the advice and wisdom that the Elders were giving out to Skully One-Eye, Sid wanted to know if his son could join the Judith Prosperous, he’s a journalist for Pirates’ Weekly and likes to report from the action, Skully One-Eye agreed that he could join them for a while. He’d be arriving in a few days.

Character Profile



“The Elders”

Alice Cooper-- Sid Cutler
Ozzy Osburne-- Elmer Knifenose
Keith Richards-- Tobias Brower


Sid Cutler was a great pirate captian who sailed the saes for nearly 40 years. Sid met Tobias many years before and they decided that after many years of sailing the saes that it was time to remain on land. They built a house up a murky river on a secluded island. They have many pirate visitors from around the world comem to them to seek advice. They welcomed Elmer to join them, and made a list a requirements that one needs to fulfill before becoming an elder. You must be a pirate of 40 plus years and you must at one point been a captain. Once those requirements have been met then the pirate will be entitled to join the elders and learn all the pirate secrets.

Chapter 10

Medusa finally made her attack on Ursula in the kitchen. Ursula was cooking lunch when Medusa quietly snuck into the kitchen. Ursula turned around just as one of Medusa’s snakes struck her. Ursula dropped to the ground. Medusa then walked onto the deck where most of the crew was. Skully One-Eye spotted her and ask her what she wanted. “I am here to destroy you all, and make you into my slaves” said Medusa. Skully One Eye replied “your not a witch, we just dealt with one of those already, you cant make us become your slaves, your just some crazy lady with snakes on here head”. Just as Skully was saying this one of the snakes on her head reached out and bit Bella Dizzy. Lurg and Condi together attacked Medusa. But it was unless the snakes bit them both too. Chester shot a poison dart, but poison darts are useless against Medusa. Suddenly a large thunderous explosion went off and filled the ship with smoke. Finale had shot a cannon at Medusa, but when the smoke cleared Medusa was still alive and kicking. Medusa was now mad and went into a rampage attacking everyone who was still standing. Chester and Finale both struck. Maximo being the super jackalope that he is jumped into the air and tried to attack Medusa but he too was struck. Skully One-Eye, Hackin Eve and Vasca de Gama all ran into Skully’s cabin and locked the door. Medusa was unstoppable, poisons had no effect on her and no one could get close enough to get a good sword swing into her without the snakes biting them.

While in the cabin Vasca told Skully One-Eye about 3 wise men called “The Elders”, who were so knowledgeable that they know all of the seas evil and knew everything about pirates. The Elders were 3 once great pirate captains who no longer sail the seas but living in an old house up a murky river on an island, which the Judith Prosperous was just off the coast of. The elders were made up of Sid Cutler, Elmer Knifenose, and Tobias Brower. Vasca was once a mate on Sid Cutlers ship many years before. Skully One-Eye decided that he, Vasca and Hackin Eve must go and talk to the elders. The three of them jumped out of the cabins window and into the water. Together they swam to the island where they commandeered a small rowboat. “What happened on the ship tonite was fucked up” Skully One-Eye said to Vasca and Eve.

It was a creepy spooky ride up the river. Vasca and Hackin Eve rowed as Skully One-Eye directed them. Once they finally reached the house that the elders were at Skully One-Eye and his two mates slowly walked up the creaky duck towards the house. The crew found the men sitting in a dark room. They asked Skully One-Eye why has he come and Skully One-Eye said that they had an evil Greek who has come on his ship.

Elmer Knifenose spoke some mumble jumble that Skully nor the 2 mates understood, he was translated by Tobias Brower who started to talk to Skully One-Eye but then turned his speech into a drunken ramble. The both of them were translated by Sid Cutler who told the story of the evil Medusa. Sid Cutler told them that the only way too get to Medusa was to spread and cover themselves in a sea-jelly found on the ocean floor. The sea-jelly would make them immune to Medusa’s poisonous bite, and also weaken the snakes.

Skully One-Eye and his crew knew what they had to do in order to weaken Medusa and save their fellow mates. The pirates stayed awhile at the Elders house and they learned about the lives of the Elders and Vasca reminisced with Sid about their times sailing together. The next evening the pirates said goodbye to the elders. Skully One-Eye, Vasca de Gama, and Hackin Eve Bones’ set out to find the sea-jelly and save their ship!!

Chapter 9

The crew departed Spain and headed out in to the Mediterranean. They wanted to make the most of it while they were in Europe before they headed home to the Caribbean.

The Judith Prosperous first went to Morocco. They snuck in the middle of the night and raided the city. They left Morocco an hour later with a large amount of gold and treasure. The Judith Prosperous next sailed to Monte Carlo. The pirates hit up the town- going to the bars and casinos. The crew gambled away and drank away the rest of the night. By the time everyone returned to the ship Skully One-Eye, who was on deck watched as Finale snuck into Condi’s cabin and Chester snuck into Bella Dizzy’s cabin.

Over the next few weeks the Judith Prosperous sailed from European port to port. Greece was their last stop before they headed home. While they were in port in Greece raiding a town, an infamous evil Greek snuck onto the JP.

The crew sailed back to the Caribbean with a vast amount of new wealth. Their new wealth could possibly make the crew of the JP one of the wealthiest pirates in all the seas. But what the crew didn’t know was that danger was just waiting to strike. The JP had been gone for 6months from the Caribbean and it had been over 6months since Audra had died and everyone still missed her.

Danger was looming on the ship. The danger was because of Medusa the evil Greek who snuck onto the ship.

Chapter 8

None of the Spanish navy men would tell Skully One Eye why he was arrested. For 3 weeks they remained captive on the ship as it crossed the Atlantic into Europe. The crew was just told that the King and Queen of Spain put out the arrest for them.

Once they finally reached Spain they were brought to the palace. They waited in the grand ballroom for the King and Queen. Skully One-Eye knew that pirates and royalty don’t get along and usually a Queen would have a death warrant out for a pirate. Skully One-Eye thought to himself that he hasn’t pillaged any Spanish ports, he hasn’t raided or attacked any Spanish ships so why would the Spanish have him arrested and brought all the way over to Spain?

Finally the Queen entered. She was the person who was commander of the country because her husband was a commoner who married in and isn’t really royalty, but only by marriage. The Queen spoke “You may be wondering why I had you and the crew arrested and brought here? Well its because of the great thing you have done!’ Skully One-Eye was puzzled.

“You see Skully, my daughter is Audra Bellamy. The shocker struck everyone. Ursula Birdwind handed Bella Dizzy 5 gold pounds as Bella screamed, “I knew it… she always did act like a princess sleeping on her princess bed, Ursula lost the bet. The Queen smirked at Bella Dizzy and continued her story. “Audra Bellamy is really my daughter. She is 3rd in line for the Spanish Throne right behind her two sisters. Her real name is Princess Isabel Audra Constantinople.” The Queen pointed to a painting on the wall, it was a portrait of the royal family with Audra front and center, none of the crew noticing it until it was pointed out. The Queen continued… “Isabella, or Audra as you called her hated the royal lifestyle and hated being a princess. Her heart was always for the sea and she longed to be a pirate. One day she simply left the palace and became a stow away on a ship headed for the Caribbean. Audra would write home very often, but never said what ship she was on or who her captain was because she knew we would be able to track her down. And it wasn’t until the Pirates’ Weekly came out with my daughter’s obituary on the front page that we learned of her new pirate name, her captain, and her ship. I was so saddened and shocked to read that my youngest daughter was dead. All the letters she sent home were filled with so much happiness and excitement, she wrote about everything that happened on the ship and the great time she was having. It was as if I the Queen was living vicariously through her. I had never seen her that happy before. Which leads to say that I have brought you here, crew of the Judith Prosperous to thank you for making my daughter happy and for letting her live a life she always wanted. And enough though I am saddened that she died under mysterious circumstances I would like to make you Skully One-Eye and Lurg to be protected by the Spanish Armada. You are free from any crimes you shall ever commit against Spain”.


Skully One-Eye and Lurg weren’t big for royal ceremonies but they definitely liked the royal pardon that the Queen gave to them. The Queen welcomed the pirates to stay at the palace for the next few days. The Queen shared stories about Audra as a princess and the pirates told the Queen about Audra as a pirate. Many laughs were shared during those days in Spain. It was truly a sight to behold, the clean upper class royalty having a great old time with the dirty pirates.

When everyone was saying goodbye on the last day in Spain the Queen mentioned that the Judith Prosperous was sailed over by her men, that it was cleaned from top to bottom and that it was fully stocked with new fruits and livestock. The pirates thanked the Queen and said goodbye.

Chapter 7

Things were different on the Judith Prosperous following Audra Bellamy’s death. There was no more lullabies’ at night to help the crew fall asleep. There was no more rooster calls made by Audra at dawn to wake everyone up. And Lurg seemed more evil and conniving than ever.

Deidre Vasquez was a stow-away on the Judith Prosperous for many months now. She came on as Audra’s life coach, but also got involved with a certain female pirate. Deidre was finally discovered hiding behind a stall by Hackin’ Eve and Maximo, who were cleaning out the animal stalls in the lower deck. Hackin Eve alerted Lurg and Skully One-Eye of the witch’s presence. Lurg and Skully put Deidre into a prison cell.

Deidre told Skully One Eye about Audra coming to her and asking Deidre to be her life coach, and invited Deidre to hideout on board the ship. Deidre then exposed her secret affair.

Deidre told Skully about her affair with Condi! Skully gasped he was shocked. It made a lot of sense though; he’s always wanted to have sweet sex with Condi. Skully One-Eye held a meeting with Lurg and Condi. Condi felt betrayed that Deidre would expose their love affair. Skully One-Eye gave the option to Condi either Deidre can stay aboard the ship and join them, or Deidre can walk the plank. Condi would think about it and let Skully know later.

Later that evening Condi went to the dungeon to talk to Deidre. Things didn’t go to well. Deidre told Condi that she used Condi because she needs the love of a strong independent woman in order to make her magic stronger. Condi was furious—she was used by Deidre. Deidre then told Condi that she was on deck the night that Audra died and that saw had seen everything that had happened. And she would tell Skully One-Eye and Lurg the information unless Condi allowed her to stay on the ship.

You see if there is one thing that Condi really hates it’s being blackmailed. Condi went back on deck and told a lie to Lurg and Skully One-Eye that Deidre had killed Audra and made it look like a suicide. Lurg was furious, and he stormed down the stairs to the dungeon. He opened the cell and began to attack Deidre. Deidre used her magic and turned one of the milk cows into a raging bull. The bull busted out of its stall and stormed down the hallway, crushing Lurg against a wall. Deidre tried to run out of the ships lower level but she was shot with a poison dart by Bella Dizzy. The poison on the dart made it so the Deidre could no longer remember any of her spells, therefore temporarily disabling her. The raging bulls spell would wear off in a few hours and it would turn back into a milk cow. But in the meantime while the raging bull was still there, Skully-One Eye, Bella Dizzy, Finale The Periwinkle, Maximo and Chester Buoy played rodeo on the bull. Ultimately Bella Dizzy won the bull-riding contest, she was able to stay on the bull the longest because she knows how to bounce on it. After the bull riding once the spell wore off, the pirates ran over to see Lurg. He was unconscious so they brought him to Bella’s medic cabin.

Lurg awoke later that night, just as Skully and Condi were making Deidre walk to plank. Deidre threatened the pirates, saying that they would regret it if they proceed to make her walk, but the pirates didn’t listen to her threats. As she was at the end of the plank, she told everyone that she didn’t kill Audra but in fact she saved her. She saved Audra in many ways. She freed her, and Audra lived a happy life because of Deidre. Skully One-Eye had enough of Deidre Vasquez; the life coach and voodoo witch had to be gone. And with her hands tied together Deidre jumped from the plank and into the water.

The pirate crew that night went to bed shocked and confused, as to the mysterious death of Audra and how it was getting stranger and stranger. In the medic cabin and Lurg and Bella Dizzy made crazy monkey sex, apparently she was re-enacting to Lurg how she rode the bull today. Finale The Periwinkle was doing a new job that Skully assigned, to check the ship and make sure that there are no stow aways. As Finale was down in the dungeon she found Deidre’s old magic book.

Once Morning came the Judith Prosperous found that their ship was surrounded by almost 100 ships from the Spanish Armada. There were no battles, Skully One-Eye and crew were quickly arrested and put into a cell……

The Spanish Armada headed for Spain.